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In his 1967 New York Review of Books鈥� essay, 鈥淕od鈥檚 Country,鈥� James Baldwin cautioned: 鈥淭hough we would like to live without regrets, and sometimes proudly insist that we have none, this is not really possible, if only because we are mortal.鈥� As children, many of us were schooled with fables on how to prevent problems via smart planning鈥攂uild your house out of bricks not straw; diligence鈥攕tore up for the winter instead of fiddling; and perseverance鈥攕low and steady wins the race. Yet because we are human, we are condemned to imperfect foresight, resigning ourselves to a remorseful, 鈥淚f only I had鈥︹��

Most of us regret decisions we have made in relationships, education, finances, and careers. If only I knew then, what I have learned since. How might have I handled that conflict differently or spoken to someone in a different way? What if I had taken that position instead of this one? Why did I hire him? I never anticipated that! And so forth!